Seeing Red

A dark theme appears to be running and seemed somewhat hidden until recently, or not so hidden once you connect the dots that are available. And we do have a saying in society, for behaviour of an angry nature, where we might say someone ‘sees red’ before they lose it. But this is not for that. This is for a more sinister setup altogether, like A Rather Dark Enterprise perhaps touched upon, but a darker sequel to it.

It is said there are dark clubs, projects, and secret societies that harvest children. For awful purposes generally, but one that has made it into the mainstream in the last few years, features red. As clothing, shoes, accessories, and other things, it being said that it’s human skin being used for those products, as the raw material. And when they make a big deal of red, it’s a sign and a marker.

I have also noted how red ties together vampires, santa, and his anagram namesake Satan. A bright colour used to lure, and a calling card, one that represents blood, as is portrayed with poppies.

There have been a number of examples of companies and prominent people being embroiled in scandals. None of which see an end to it, or an overall exposure. More a desensitisation of people, and a slow meander to make it all more mainstream. And many will not be able to, or will want to really comprehend the horrors being discussed. Which is probably what is expected of many. Not just to turn a blind eye, but to blind the mind to its atrocity altogether.

And we are in a time when corruption and horrors are being revealed on a scale not seen before, so I can understand why people might be struggling. To either keep up or to properly assimilate what they are seeing in the media or firsthand. And the feeling and thoughts that follow, or not for some people. Many people were switched off and dissociated before 2020 threw us into a new time. A time of needing to be more on your guard than ever before, and to try and see what’s behind the bright colours and lies. It’s going to be important…

(c) K Wicks

The Blame Game

I am not here to ever defend the actions of the departments of the government, but I do believe in apportioning blame where it is due, and looking at the facts. The article that made me write this was of the unfortunate passing of a young lady, and the article is being shown as if it is the DWP at fault, for hounding her for years and that she dies of starvation after having her benefits removed, article here.

There have been a few incidents of these types of articles and unfortunate people, but when I take the time to read the article, something else jumps out at me, that makes me realise that the departments of government people expect to have sorted this aren’t entirely to blame, it’s a shared event.

For this particular one, I was surprised to read that she had family, although it was the police who found her weeks after death. They say she was living on a sandwich a day, because she told her mother so. Okay, so family were in regular contact, and knew she wasn’t eating enough? She wasn’t physically disabled, or mentally impaired, but had mental distress issues, and had her own place – although was obviously a struggle to maintain, and get constant funding for it from said various departments of government.

Then, further into the read, it says she had aspirations of owning a bungalow to do up, and was worried about the small amount of savings she had. So, hang on a minute. She had money, but didn’t want to use it, she had family, but they didn’t want to help her, she wasn’t completely incapable, but wouldn’t help herself? Am I missing something? I am all for having sympathy and seeing the injustice, but in an applicable situation. So, as I read on through the article, it struck me as odd that all the blame was being put on the DWP and other public services, who have a shocking record of abandoning people who they should have been there for, I won’t deny. But in this situation, I guess I am asking myself why the family didn’t make sure she was eating enough? Why weren’t they visiting regularly to check in, or help to sort them out in some way, by some means? Have we completely abandoned the idea of family and community so much, that we now only look to and expect the government and institutions and their insidious branches to solve every issue, want, need, crisis and experience of our lives? It is a tragedy that a young life not yet fulfilled is cut short, by any means. But even more so not to recognise all the failures that led to it. It seems they are often used as a weapon to throw mud at something, rather than really make sure that doesn’t happen again. Maybe one day, we will learn.

(c) K Wicks

More than sinister

This is a follow up to my previous article It Looked Sinister, as it turns out it never stopped and has taken a darker turn.

A country with similar landmass to us in the UK but far fewer people, has decided to implement euthanasia for cv19 patients, and that the doctor decides who will and wont make it. Not nature, oh no, they will end it for you after immobilising you with drugs and a ventilator, perhaps. New Zealand if you are wondering. And as a bonus to the doctors, they will received over one thousand dollars payment for it, plus expenses. Death doctors on commission I have decided to call them, and perhaps they were always there, I have just been naive to think that it wasn’t always about money and targets.

There is also emerging data surrounding people in a professional capacity manipulating the elderly in care homes and hospital and ultimately finishing them off to profit from their wills, estates and assets. It seems a pretty sewn up and slick operation targeting the vulnerable at their most vulnerable and goes back decades, so as you may imagine, this free for all has given a great cover to excel their operations and to engage in further nefarious activities.

Now there are also new reports emerging of more DNR’s, but this time being placed on and ‘offered’ to children (and adults) with learning disabilities! And still some aren’t shocked. Is that because they have desensitized people? Do people just not care? Are there more eugenicists among us than we thought? It doesn’t matter how much I hear it, the shock doesn’t go away, or even lessen. In my other article touching upon the real horror of the kind of commodity we are viewed as, Perhaps – they so casually say that with living cadavers to use, they would no longer need to use prisoners, volunteers, and the real kicker – mentally retarded children. Repeat that, and see if you are ok with it. I am horrified at what people have done, are doing, and want to do to.

How much more do they need to see before people piece it all together? To know we have all been thrown under the proverbial bus, but some of the most vulnerable are being abused, ignored, and even discarded. In multiple countries the law have been more than heavy handed and causing injury – with the threat of military being used now and again. They have been quarantining people, closing down businesses and fining them and people for no good reason other than dodgy data. They have crippled the economy. And all they did was say something, show a few videos and then gave ‘orders’ for people to screw over people. The ones running the show do not have our best interests at heart. At all. They want us tired, confused, worn down and wanting to be saved from ourselves. And many appear to be of that minset I have to admit, before and now after two years of it. As if the ones who appear to have given up aren’t even sure what they are fighting for anymore, because we know the old system didn’t work. It was never meant to. But what to make of the new age that is being thrown at us and we are being dragged towards? Do we accept their cruel, sterile, controlled vision of the future? Or do we take a moment, and help to reshape it into something worthwhile?

It would seem there are meant to be some losses along the way in this though. I have noticed a sudden increase in reports of all sorts of serious health issues and deaths within my age group which wasn’t present before. Noticeably so. Suicides are up as well as depression and various other created scenarios and situations where people are being pushed to the limit across the board, mentally and physically.

It will remain to be seen if we are nearing an end to the great deception, but what follows will not be a calm and functioning society for quite some time if it continues as is. They have made sure of that. The great reset they have planned will not step aside lightly, and one can only hope that instead we can steer it to be the great awakening as some have said it will be.

Stay sharp and be mindful of your thoughts.

(c) K Wicks

Excuses or obstacles?

This observation is regarding one of social barriers towards employment and housing. Both briefly touched on in Work ethic and employment and What you see here, but only from a general view of those subjects. The personal impact of which I have experienced myself and witnessed others go through.

I’ll explain. Society appears to have put in place multiple restrictions and obstacles to make society harder for some people. Deliberately. It seems remarkably easy for someone to find themselves in a difficult position financially, that is not new. But how they are able to get themselves out of it, has changed.

I noticed it years ago as I got old enough to start looking for work and somewhere to live. I left home a month after turning 18, with no qualifications, a bag of clothes and a cheque for £240 from my stepdad. Headed for somewhere I had visited a couple of times and where I knew someone. Who ironically left for University just as I moved there, but his mum let me sleep on her sofa for a month or so. That was my first leg up, I traded cleaning and school runs for food and somewhere to sleep. I couldn’t get any government help until I had somewhere to live where it wouldn’t compromise their benefits. So I made friends with people, offered to help where I could and tried to form a network. Of people, of places, of opportunities. I got work behind a bar, and at an agency. Cleaned toilets and kitchens, pulled pints, worked in factories or whatever work was going that paid money. I was not fussy or work shy. I wanted better and always believed you have work for it.

At 22 I got my first office job and at 27 I started my own business. Studying and working full time at home to get there. But, and its a big but, I had an extra helping hand along the way. Without parents in my life (long story but from 18 I was on my own) my grandparents stepped up to help me once I had proven I could support myself. They gave me my deposit for my first house at 22 after the office job was held down. Without them helping me, I wouldn’t have been in a stable enough position financially to study, or think about what I wanted to do, and then do it. I get very stressed when worried about money or wondering if I will have somewhere to live. It takes over everything. So I have lots of compassion for people who are having a tough time, and can’t just be positive, or constructive with their thought or time. Worrying about affording food next week and rent is real for many.

But now I shall move to the system that creates that cycle. Everything has a gateway to it now, money through a bank – looking to be made even weirder and more controlled with digital, mentioned in my article Cash. Rent and somewhere to live through a letting/estate agent or council usually, casual jobs through an agency. All of those things are essential for basic living, so if you tighten the reigns on any one of those, the knock on effect is directly on people and how they live.

The middle man gets to decide your fate. If you don’t have a bank account, usually you can’t a job, which means no rental unless you can find a good private landlord directly. Most of the private rentals here state no DSS. That’s not new at all, but many now say no pets. No smoking. No kids. Which of course, is the landlords perogative, but where does that leave someone who is trying to get themselves together or move up a bit. Or when there are 10 people applying for each property, more probably.

People having to cohabitate because they can’t afford not to. Or stuck in a job they hate because there aren’t better paid ones you can do because while they held down wages, they upped the cost of living dramatically. Of course, its easy to say, just leave. Just quit that job, just move somewhere else. And it is. If you don’t mind winging it, and not having any Security initially, and working it out as you go. But not everyone can deal with change or can think on their feet, so I see where they are in a bind. Excuses become obstacles, because there is usually a logical answer to suit any personal situation. But when you are talking generally, not every answer will suit everyone. We all have different needs and wants, but are forced into this one size fits all regime with jumping through hoops for housing and work just so we can lay our head at night in safety and not go hungry. Now with the looming restrictions of making it even harder for people to access basic amenities and securities, it doesn’t look like anyone is getting any kind of helping hand or a break anytime soon.

So all I can hope is that we stop looking to government, councils and authority to help us and start helping ourselves and each other.

I have linked a number of my other recent articles, in case of interest as they are all observations of society.

(c) K Wicks

So Much Is Wrong About This

How do you really explain to someone what is wrong with this picture? Where do you start? It seems so many have been sleepwalking through life for so long. But what has happened over the last 18 months is astounding and should be undeniable, yet we have among us, those who either through choice or just plain ignorance, can’t see what is right there. I have already highlighted in my previous article It looked sinister about the very odd and fatal happenings within the NHS and ‘care’ system.

But that is one part of a very big unfolding picture, which is proving to be too large to really break down into a quick chat, or a briefing, or of being able to ‘get someone up to speed’ as it were. And that is not by accident. It’s meant to be that convoluted and divided, otherwise it would be so obvious, no-one would have fallen for it. I have never wanted to be right about what I had theorised would happen, either before this about where society was going, or after the ‘pandemic’ started to rear its ugly head as an organised plot. Being this way, “suspicious, cynical and seeing corruption everywhere” as my grandpa puts it, isn’t a choice. I see what is there, but sometimes think I would gladly shut it out if I could. It can bring a melancholy that follows you everywhere, knowing the system isn’t broken after all, that it is exactly how ‘They’ meant it to be. Interestingly though, my grandpa did not try to say that corruption wasn’t everywhere, just that I shouldn’t focus on it and point it out all the time. It didn’t go unnoticed.

So, let’s talk about They. Who are They? That is usually where people roll their eyes and say, “oh, the mystical ‘they’, sounds like conspiracy talk to me”. And that’s where I know I have lost people, which is ok, I don’t demand they have the same interests as me or be able or willing to undertake complex thought. It really isn’t in everyone’s repertoire, and every now and then, I envy that. But trying to explain who They are, means unravelling who really pulls the strings, who makes the decision about finance, health, society, education etc. It would appear to be politicians. They are the face of the people, but they do not design the systems. They are employed to roll out the systems, to make them palatable, and acceptable. To ensure that the overall purpose is achieved, whatever that may be.

There is much published about nefarious plans to reduce population, or to wipe us out by way of a virus or biological agent, so is it really that unreasonable to think some people may be suspicious of that given what has occurred recently. To simply denounce them as ridiculous or a conspiracy theorist seems awfully narrow minded to me. I would want to know why they thought that. Just as I would like to know why people don’t see it, it might be they have a different angle on it. Surely that’s how we improve our own viewpoints and try to understand others? I have read many things which make me very nervous and wary of where this is all going. Not because I read others words and it makes me worry, but because I read the words and I see things with my own eyes, the outcome. What I theorised so far has come true, so I feel I am doing the right thing by being concerned. To turn a blind eye to what is unfolding would be as criminal as the wrongdoing happening around us.

I want to be wrong. And if I am, what happens, nothing. Maybe a bit of ridicule, but no harm to anyone, I have not given advice or told anyone what to do with their life. But what if I am right, what if it is going to go where I think it is being steered towards. I would want to know I did something, that I said something. That I tried. And although films are thought to be fiction, we appear to be living in a rather macabre mixture of many of them all at once right now. Maybe I will do another post over the weekend giving a breakdown of which ones and why, in case anyone is interested. I will close with what appears to be an extremely apt quote from a film some of you may be familiar with…

“Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn’t there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission” – V for Vendetta

(c) K Wicks

Meeting in the Middle of Nowhere

You know when you hear the phrase ‘not on the same page’? Implying that you are both not quite thinking along the same lines. When we realised there was a massive difference in thought going on, I realised we weren’t even in the same book.

We discovered that my husband is Aphantasic, meaning he doesn’t see any mental imagery in mind. I on the other hand, it turns out, am Hyperphantasic, someone who visualises most of the time. It may seem like a small difference to some people, and maybe it is to others, but for us it was huge. And went some way to explain why he just couldn’t understand my viewpoint on many things – despite various method of breaking it down or through logical explanations. Once we knew, I don’t expect him to understand certain things now. Because I can imagine what it is like to not have the ability – or affliction, to see images in mind, have internal narration (inner monologue) and recurring memories. In fact, once I did imagine what it was like to not have them, I understood him better and things made more sense. But the flipside of that, is that he can’t do the same. He does not imagine. So his understanding of me is limited, the best way I felt I could explain it was to write it down. Put in into sections of what areas of life I felt this made a difference.

From that came my book, Meeting in the Middle of Nowhere, describing what it is like to have Hyperphantasia and how I feel this has affected many areas of my life and experiences. And describing as best I can, the viewpoint on those subjects from someone with Aphantasia.

Meeting in the Middle of Nowhere.

(c) K Wicks

Forethought & Consequence…

Excerpt from my recently published book – Meeting in the middle of Nowhere, looking at the differences between someone with Aphantasia – my husband, and on the other side Hyperphantasia – Me.

‘Without the ability to plan out future scenarios, forethought and consequence are hampered in my view. Being able to plan one’s life seems like it would be much harder, could come across as quite haphazard to someone like me and ‘on the hop’ as it were.

My mother was this way, ‘a bit flighty’ we used to say. And if she hadn’t passed away, I would have a ton of questions for her about my theories on how she ended up the way she did. So I was strangely prepared for this type of living although I don’t enjoy it. Before my husband and I met, I had been living in the same town for about sixteen years, and only two different houses in the space of thirteen years. From being moved around all the time and having no roots in my childhood, all I wanted to do was settle down when I grew up. So I did.

He had also moved around a lot, but hadn’t ever wanted to settle. He didn’t feel the need to do the same thing every day, didn’t want to see the same people and talk about the same old crap. He doesn’t do small talk and general chit chat just to pass the time, even with me. I would say he is an adventurer. He wants to experience life and be there, because without that, life really is boring. He can’t imagine being somewhere, he can’t ‘switch off’ and go into fantasy land, and he can’t sit there and mentally time travel to pass the time or rethink things. So he takes enjoyment from things as they happen.

I have a lot of hobbies, I needed lots of mental stimulation growing up and found reading, writing, drawing, movies, embroidery, cooking, cleaning and anything that I could find to occupy my brain. I feel like I accidentally experienced life because I just happened to be there and through other people and opportunities. All of it took mental planning and visualising, all my pastimes, all my career choices and ambitions. If I don’t think about them in advance, I don’t get geared up to do them. My motivation sometimes needs motivating.

He doesn’t have any mental pictures to inspire him and with this, boredom took on a whole new meaning to me. I understood why he seemed agitated and bored a lot, because he genuinely is. There is no forethought happening to plan tasks or time filling activities. And it’s a vicious circle, bored because you aren’t doing anything, but literally can’t think of anything to do. Travel seems to be the thing for him, getting there is part of the adventure and then being somewhere, doing something. It’s live and happening. So we have had to find a way to work with both. So that I don’t feel completely unsettled by never knowing what’s coming next. I need time to mentally prepare for things, and so he doesn’t feel like his life is Groundhog Day. It’s easy to say ‘find something to do’ but this doesn’t strike me as an easy task for him. Hell, it’s sometimes not an easy task for me and I have a million and one things going through my head to do.

Another classic saying springs to mind for this chapter ‘Look before you leap’. This for me has always been associated with thinking ahead and for awareness of consequence.

But within an awareness of consequence must be a fear of it too surely? If there is no fear of the consequence because it is not happening, then why would you hold yourself back? I don’t think you would for some people, but you wouldn’t really know why. On the other hand, having an awareness of the repercussion and fear of it does not automatically mean it can be averted either. I have found a classic example of forethought and consequence causing two quite avoidable injuries I sustained in childhood.

Example: I was about seven or eight years old and I had a push bike. A Raleigh BMX to be precise, red and white. I loved it and would blat to the shops or down to my friend’s house, no problems. On this one particular day, I was biking to what we called ‘the 10 0’clock shop’ – probably no mystery as to why. Running parallel to the very straight main road, was a side road with a row of houses, but was steeply dipped coming up at the shop. So I decided to take the dipped road, with the intention of peddling as fast as I could down, so that it wasn’t such a hard slog up if you got some momentum behind you. Sounded like a solid plan, and it was.

Until for what would appear to be no reason at all (I now suspect Hyperphantasia) I started to wonder if what I had been told was true. Does your front wheel buckle if you let go of your handlebars while going really fast? Now, you may think this thought might have just been dismissed and I continued on my speedy way. No such luck. I wanted to know. Had to know if my imaginings of it all going horrible wrong were correct. So, I let go. And true to the information I had been given and had imagined, my front wheel buckled. I flew over the front of the bike and fell face first onto the concrete.

I really hadn’t given enough thought to what would happen next in a physical sense. What did happen was a lot of pain, a fair amount of blood, some smashed in front teeth with one completely missing. And luckily a random lady coming out of one of the houses to help patch me up. I felt stupid, I’m not going to lie. I wasn’t really sure what it was that had made me do it, I had put logic to one side and just went for it. It scared me a bit when I started to understand what I was capable to doing to myself. We are very breakable, and I guess as children it can be a hard time learning that however your brain works.

Example: Around the same time in my life, we had three dogs. One of them in particular had an issue with things coming through the letterbox. Anything that came through was, for want of a better word, savaged. So, again, in my ridiculous childhood thought process, wondered. Could it be possible, that if I put my hand through the letterbox, it will get treated with the same contempt? The answer is yes, but only temporarily. In the dogs defense, as soon as he realised it was my hand, he let go. Unfortunately his tooth had punctured one of my fingers, there was screaming and lots of blood. A few stitches in my index finger and I was fine, but started to see a pattern forming. I didn’t trust what I was told or even my own thoughts and felt the need to prove these things, even at great cost to myself. It was here I think I first started to understand about instinct and how you are just going to have work out some things for yourself. Where others may be giving you really sound advice, take heed. That does not mean take the advice, but keep it in mind.’

meeting-in-the-middle-of-nowhere-new-cover-front-only-may-2021

 

(c) K Wicks