Light and shadows

Sometimes the light just catches her little face perfectly and it’s a still moment to try and reach for the camera or phone before she moves. Photography inside the house makes her excited, I guess because I get excited. Outside so far she just sits next to me, but we haven’t got to the spring yet when macro season starts for me, so we shall see.

maya stripes

(c) K Wicks

Ashdown House…

A visit to neolithic sites took us to Wiltshire on this day and we happened to stop at Ashdown Park. There is a field of Sarsen stones before the estate starts, and passed the house there is an iron age hill fort (apparently), called Alfred’s Castle. Walking through the wooded areas to get to this, we came out onto the long lawn area to see the house at the far end. It was quite the cloudy day…

(c) K Wicks

Chronesthesia (Mental Time Travel)…

During the writing of my recent book, ‘Meeting in the Middle of Nowhere’, i fully believed I was investigating my husband. We had discovered after a year or two or marriage that we weren’t quite on the same page about a great many things and this led me to ask a lots of questions. I like to know the why’s and how’s for things. I don’t mind people thinking differently or having another view, but I like to know why.

But once we discovered the why, Aphantasia, it was a snow ball effect thereafter. The more we learnt, the more it changed how we saw ourselves rather than each other. And in learning more about Aphantasia, I stumbled across Hyperphantasia. It fit, a little too perfectly. Like him, I thought my brain was just like everyone else’s. I thought everyone else had to contend with constant imagery, internal monologue that won’t shut up, with past thoughts coming back from nowhere. That everyone had dreams and was afflicted by thoughts, ideas and life all jostling for position, in their head. Apparently not. It was my turn to be shocked and a bit taken aback.

There more I learnt, the more there was to learn, but it felt like things were finally finding their place in mind. One chapter in the book is dedicated to Chronesthesia, what they call mental time travel. It sounds very silly to someone with Aphantasia it turns out, but not me, because it was exactly what my brain does and what I had been trying to explain to my husband. Unfortunately this process seems to go hand in hand with anxiety so it’s got to be managed like all the others. Once you know what your brain is doing, it can be easier to keep it in check!