Thoughts

Aphantasia, Imagine That!

~ MKW Publishing ~ 3 Comments

A concept that most people (apparently 98%) may find quite far removed from their ordinary thought process. How many times have you heard a sentence start with or have said yourself ‘now imagine’… Well, some people can’t. Literally.

A difference in ability only ‘discovered’ or noticed in 1880, by academic all-rounder Sir Francis Galton, but not named or studied further in much detail until 2015 when it became Aphantasia. A literal translation from the Greek meaning, lack of fantasy. (A = lack of, Phantasia = Fantasy).

Which in itself it’s a bit of a misnomer, it is not a lack of fantasy or imagination, but a lack of visual imagery.

I personally had not heard of this until a number of years ago, when discovered my ex-husband had it. Before this, we had what I thought were general communication issues, despite spending most of our time together and talking frequently about a range of subjects. I couldn’t work out where the differences in opinions and thought processes were coming from as they seemed quite illogical to me, and he is not illogical, so I knew there was something else. At first, I thought it was me, I questioned myself and my brain about what and why, and I couldn’t see it. I am fascinated by thought processes and how they impact our lives and actions and make us who we are, so wouldn’t leave this one alone.

The main point of issue was the fact that I read and write fiction and him not thinking it had any relevant place in society. I wanted to know why, really know how someone could think this of something I felt was so fundamentally necessary. It took many hours over a number of days for me to finally ask the right questions (trying not to make him feel like a test subject), coming to the conclusion of what was going on. I put forward the concept he had not considered or realised. I explained that when I read a book, my brain makes pictures up to accompany the words. Or that I can replay movies I have seen mostly if seen enough times.

“You see pictures in your head! That sounds like witchcraft to me. I can’t think of anything more alien”

And we had it. We had found the difference that explained why he thought fiction was pointless. But that was the tip of iceberg really of what was meant to be a simple explanation of why he didn’t see things the way I did. With a little bit of internet research I found the name. Aphantasia. That didn’t make it easier it turned out. I felt guilt at finding this out, of having to explain to someone why they were different, how they were different and try and support how they were feeling, when I couldn’t possibly understand. But it started to make sense. Enjoyment from fictional books that required you to imagine and picture the scene, are completely lost on him.

We did see the world differently, not just from a personal perspective, but with separate realities too. That might sound a bit dramatic, but it was and still is. Mine possibly not even entirely reality when I gave it more thought. I had always been so sure of my way of thinking, it bought into question for me, the reliability of a brain that can conjure images, pretend at will and change visual memories. Could non-aphantasiac people be trusted at all? My husband asked me one question when I confirmed it is believed most people ‘see images’ in their head. “So when people are driving, sometimes they aren’t thinking about driving and are imagining other stuff? That’s terrifying”.

And it is really.

But changing the way I think about things has helped, I didn’t expect him to as he isn’t wrong in the way he thinks, but neither am I. But I can imagine what it’s like to not imagine – it’s as close as I can get but I see the irony. What I previously saw as difficult behaviour by my standard, wasn’t when I saw it from his standard. That’s where our realities will always be different, and always were, but with a new twist now.

He is better at directions and orientation, his memory is more accurate than mine, he learns quickly, he is focused. But on the downside, he gets frustrated easily, he can’t ‘picture’ me if I am not in the room. There are pros and cons to each thought process, as there usually is with any situation or way of being to a person trying to navigate their way through life.

But while we as a species continue to study memory, thought, ideas and who we are as people, it was inevitable to me we would find variations.  I just didn’t realise what societal implications those variations would have, on both sides. There is a much broader issue here compared to what I first believed.

(c) K Wicks

Timing

~ MKW Publishing ~ 2 Comments

As a modern society, we seem rather obsessed with time, and I’m not quite sure if it’s because it has been conditioned into us, or is a natural thing for us to have past, present and future. Is it partly the concept of time that ruins us, by giving us a sense of mortality, and something to allocate time to that which is overwhelmingly important. Life. But perhaps we do not think that way about it at all, as it slips by quite unnoticed often and is treated as a never-ending commodity in some cases. But as I have said before, it’s something you can’t buy more of and you can’t get it back, so use it wisely.

And that was always the thread of the moral in tales and stories, about dreams and regret as well as hopes and a new perspective on something that didn’t essentially change, just your view on it did. Time marches on they say, it takes no prisoners and holds no favourites.

Quantum leap – A great TV series about jumping into and out of different times, people’s lives and experiences, trying to right some wrongs that occurred. I can’t recall if it was known why he had to do that, or who got to be the ‘viewer of history’ and pick the candidates to have life altering moments intercepted by an alternate being to possess you and steer them where they were ‘meant to go’.

The Butterfly Effect – A film about experience, regret and time. As the title suggests, it is shown that actions have consequences and outcomes you couldn’t have foreseen, but with hindsight and an ability to do something about it. An object is necessary in this to manifest it, a diary in his case (and video recordings for his late father). A dark and complex storyline that wasn’t light-hearted in any way, and if anything showed the extreme sadness and regret that can linger on in people.

Somewhere in time – another film, but this one with a dreamy, hazy overtone to it. But this one using the idea that you can mentally time travel by hypnotising yourself – which is rather interesting as I had wondered about it anyway through learning about Chronesthesia and Tulpaism. So, if you can ‘think’ yourself into a different time and manifest reality – is it really that outrageous an option?

Dark (TV Series) – a very strange series, and one of time and it looping back on itself in a repetitive cycle. Quite complex, and not cheery in any way, shape or form. But serious and interesting.

Dr Who – I guess the ultimate in this breakdown being a Time Lord, so one who is not bounds by the same rules and limit as others, recycled as necessary and not mortal. Changes the game a bit when it comes to possibilities if you are not doomed to such a short existence, or at least that is how they always paint it.

Back to the Future – a great set of films and iconic to many who were of that era. But going back and forth through time as needed to again fix the mistakes, or create them as was sometimes the case. I wondered about the method too in that film, the lightning strike, the exact speed and conditions needed for it to work.

They say luck befalls people who are ‘in the right place at the right time’, and equally the reverse can be said too, being ‘in the wrong place at the wrong time’, knowing it was a series of moments that led to that one. So, which moment was the right one, or indeed the wrong one, in time? Hard to know I guess until after, when retrospective thought can be applied to make sense of the event if it is at first not clear. And if you factor into that Chronesthsia and all the other mental processes, it’s a wonder we know where we are at all, let alone when we are…

(c) K Wicks

A Christmas Fireplace

~ MKW Publishing ~ 2 Comments

This is one of those strange ones, of what should perhaps be festive thoughts and ideas, but which took a rather dark turn. Thinking of times past, and how once people used to decorate a tree at Christmas to ward off evil spirits, only since the 1600’s they say, it can’t really be traced to before then. Leading me to thoughts of fireplaces, and recently have seen talk of the more elaborate ones found in grand settings, possibly being portals. So I wondered, about the open fireplace being a portal into the home, protected maybe only by the intention of those within, with charms and spells featuring throughout folklore and mythological history.

So, the thought moved on from Christmas, to the idea of vampires – and how they needed to be invited over the threshold they say, not able to gain access until you give them permission. You might see where this is going, but I will go there anyway. What if in the past, with people understanding more about evil and entities, could guard themselves against these things, and not be affected or infiltrated as much. But then time drifts on and people forget if they do not see, and a new time moves in. Of commercialism and consumerism, surely an opportunity to resurrect something that once was? Where you can take the blood red and turn it into clothing, and surround it with a story of something that will come into your house while you sleep, but only if you put out the decorations, and milk and cookies. Inviting it through the portal. And even one step further, with the ritual of presents and writing a letter to santa, signifying an exchange, and a contract for that exchange. Selling your soul for presents. A rather cynical look at it of course, as it could just as easily be said it is a ‘good’ contract, for worthy behaviour to be rewarded. But when it appears to be for grooming purposes in reality, to encourage greed and consumerism under the guise of kindness and family, I can’t help but think that it has been hijacked for a darker purpose than it appears.

And generally children are told not to talk to strangers, or accept presents from them, but when it comes to santa and Christmas, that goes out the window. I have never been comfortable with the whole thing, and clearly it has become a commercial enterprise over the last 100 years, but as with much, it seems to be a cover for a set ritual, and one the western world has been captured by. And as others have also pointed out over the years, santa just happens to be an anagram of a well know demon, an entity “that seduces humans into sin or falsehood“. Sometimes they say if there are a number of coincidences, then it is not a coincidence at all. But then again, it could just be seeing what we want to see they say. Although personally until recently, I very much enjoyed celebrating Christmas for the food, presents, decorations and as they call it ‘feeling festive’. But it has waned of late somewhat, and I do not feel that my energy should be directed towards it anymore, maybe that’s just a normal thing, growing out of the set routine that you can see is set for businesses making money and controlling peoples time, not about creating a genuine feeling. If there ever was such a thing for that time of year, we shall never know, but for what it has become I think I am happy to leave it behind…

(c) K Wicks

From The Corn

~ MKW Publishing ~ 1 Comment

Corn. A staple diet for many around the world, and a big component in food, agriculture and profits. But a few things linked together when I saw a couple of articles and gave it more thought, thinking of a few storylines here and there too.

Interstellar – where the film shows how it’s because of ecocide the planet is dying. Corn crops failing having a main mention, and ecocide meaning it was caused by human hand. I took it as we genetically engineered crops, it went wrong and doomed everyone.

Hybrid corn – we already eat hybrid corn they say as we have changed it over the centuries to be what it is. South America still having some of the original strains. So, there have already been changes made beyond what we know.

Bioengineering corn to create sterility in people. No, really. In an article from 2001 – GM crops to stop man spreading his seed, it explains the process to force sterility on people through food. Crazy stuff, eh?

Bumper harvest – apparently the US has recorded a rather good crop this year. Makes me wonder about certain ‘shortages’ being caused and reported, if maybe they then use that to flood the market with a specified source of corn.

Seed banks – many have questioned the true purpose of seed banks they have strategically placed around the world, for plants and people. In my mind it’s there as a fresh, untainted source of new stock. To skip the infected or contaminated stock, or to use once you have cleared it away when it has been deemed necessary. Sounds cynical, but it’s how it looks to me. Allowing many areas of society to be poisoned with toxins, chemicals and tinkering of all sorts of things. Putting great strain and pressure on the environment and those trying to thrive on it and in it. Downgrading it to a survivable habitat at best, definitely not as thriveable as it could be. All the while keeping the good grade stock for themselves somewhere else, or for a re-seeding program. Which may have already occurred in the past already, so we don’t even know if what we have now is original. It’s looking increasingly as though it is not.

Children of Men – the film, and how it envisions a future of sterility, by way of a virus no less, where humanity hangs on a thread. I wonder sometimes if viruses have been used so many times in films to make them a viable option in our minds. So, the other true methods can be hidden in plain sight and perhaps not even noticed.

Children of the corn – not the story by Stephen King, as that bears no relation to this. But the title sticks out to me. Making me think that the children of the corn would be the last normal generation with the new infertile version and that it will be the offspring of that generation that will be sterile. It’s hard to know really where it is headed as there really are so many points of interest to follow, but follow them I will, as best I can, to try and see where this crazy ride is going…

(c) K Wicks

A Telekinetic Idea

~ MKW Publishing ~ 1 Comment

Just a thought of some films, where the main character, or feature of a certain aspect for it is a special power. Telekinensis, often coupled with telepathy. With a particular focus seemingly to be how that ‘power’ came about. The following films are the ones that came to mind for this.

Firestarter (1984) – taken from a Stephen King story, and starred Drew Barrymore. A memorable watch and actually a good film. In this one, she developed pyrokinesis though being the offspring of two people who had been used for military testing, who themselves had developed abilities through that process.

Ascension (TV Mini Series – 2014) – a one series flash in the pan, but rather interesting for what it was. This will contain spoilers – the premise was a bunch of scientists decided to create a simulated space mission, where the occupants didn’t know it was fake. And they stole a number of bright children, put them into the ‘program’ and created an illusion of being on a craft, travelling through space. With an extra layer that they had been doing this for two generations already, and it had these weird rules and systems around breeding and what jobs you were assigned or what your allocated purpose was. But, the strange twist at the end, was that something happened to one of the younger members of the ‘crew’ where she sort of went atomic for a moment and created an energy charge caused by emotional distress. The ones monitoring and controlling the experiment seemed awfully happy with this occurring as they had theorised it would. And then they ended the series, so we’ll never know where they were going with that, but I will speculate on it shortly.

Stranger Things (TV Series – 2016) – a really well thought out and executed series, at least the first and second one. Went a bit weird in the third one and lost me, but the idea initially was great. Similar I suppose to Firestarter, the main focus being a young girl who is the offspring of someone affected by military testing of drugs. And who themselves have developed telekinetic and various linked abilities.

Carrie (1976) – another Stephen King one, where an isolated, lonely teenage girl discovers horrifying telekinetic powers when pushed to the emotional edge. Again, well done and worth a watch.

Dr Jean Grey (X-Men films) – A running character and one of the main ones, but has the highest ability afforded in any fictional character along these lines.

Now, having telepathic characters, or angry women who are ‘activated’ when needed to use special abilities isn’t anything new, or technically out of the ordinary when you are talking fiction or science fiction. But, when I looked at those storylines (have to admit, didn’t think of any featuring boys as the ones who get that same power), it struck me how they were all girls or women. And the running theme of most of them, is that it needs to be suppressed if it can’t be controlled. Now, that could just be a classic analogy to recreate societal ideals, or it really could be about fearing something in females, that hasn’t necessarily become known. I already speculated on women having more power than some would like when it comes to reproduction in The Creator and the Destroyer. Another film comes to mind too with that, Species.

But for a wild, fictional, speculatory theory one could say that women have almost been feared at some point, and it was deemed necessary to bind them, hold them down and condition them to believe they are weak, and powerless in the bigger scheme of things. At the mercy of patriarchy and male domination, beholden to rules and standards set and enforced by them, leading to a rather downtrodden percentage of the population. I also notice though, that isn’t entirely true, as if you look back through history, and fiction, women have possessed great power, or authority. To the point of terrifying in some cases, witches, goddesses, sirens and more. Vengeful, devious, filled with rage and unforgiving torment in more than a few stories. And it may well be that it’s trying to be brought out and harnessed, as it always is portrayed in the films, caused deliberately with a view to control it. But that kind of thing surely is just fiction, isn’t it?

Tornado from wallpapers.com

(c) K Wicks