There seems to be a lot of hoo-ha currently going on about names, and the requirement by some to be relabelled and have a new name that others need to recognise or they ‘lose their shit’, is the best way I can put it. With some online videos having done the rounds recently and over the years of people literally having a full public tantrum and meltdown over being addressed in a polite, but different manner than they would like or want. Quite the spectacle then ensues over something they deem important, and only them. So, I have given some thought to what it is that is so special about a name, that for those people, it reinforces their whole reality, to the point of madness. Most people though, not so much. If you have ever had a strange or difficult first name or surname, then you may have come up against someone not bothering to pronounce it properly, which may have led to disappointment or correcting them, but I have never seen it lead to a public tantrum, or even a ‘private’ meltdown. Although, no longer private these days in some cases too, because the person having said meltdown will often then film themselves having an episode about it, and share that online. Ensuring that others can see their ‘pain’ at hearing a word they did not like, showing the world that their fragile reality is based on a word, and that others must play long for it to be ‘harmonious reality’ for them. Seems like a number of issues working alongside each other there, personality and identity disorders as well as an inability to process and deal with emotions, and understand acceptable boundaries of interaction with other people.

Because while someone who is having those issues may scream and shout about being accepted and labelled correctly, they sort of then open a floodgate. That is to say, the gloves are suddenly off on both sides. Because demanding to say and do whatever you want, because you ‘feel like it’, means others can also use that card, to say and do whatever they want back, because they also ‘feel like it’. And if you come up against someone who has the same level of rage, or level of hysteria, then all hell breaks loose. But there is a difference, to me anyway, of one being usually developed and possibly medicated in a way that clearly seems to suppress emotional maturity and development, and perhaps normal emotional reasoning. Which may indeed play a role towards why they act like that in public. But the other type who is on the receiving end and may respond, which could well be medicated too in some way, they say we all have a ‘mothers little helper’ to get through the day, are what I think of as the Falling Down type. Like the movie. Where you are wound up over a number of years with a number of life problems, like an elastic band ready to snap. A fair amount of that will be building as the conditions are being set for more of it in people. But it’s odd, to me, that someone would think that merely a name can represent who they are, and if they shout it at people loud enough and demand it be used, they will suddenly see you for you. Whereas actually, from all the shouting and behaviour being displayed to ‘make people’ hear and see ‘who you are’, they have already decided you are a complete tit, and don’t even care at that point what you are called. And will instead decide that you require a wide berth rather than to be pandered to. There is a sad hilarity in that which doesn’t escape me, that in trying to be accepted in such a dysfunctional way, you in fact alienate people and push them away from you. Sometimes it is necessary to ‘nip things in the bud’ as they say, because if left unchecked or given some misguided encouragement, it can turn into quite the ugly monster of behaviour, as you may well have realised along the way.

But despite it seeming as if there is nothing in a name On the face of it, and although one might think it cannot determine your persona or reality, there does seem to be a case for looking at other things that I believe tie in. And why it might actually be relevant, but not in the way people think. Because it is a bit of a thing when conditioning people, of trying to erase their history or identity, that you will go to great lengths to change or abolish their name. This is maybe why it’s pushed so much that if someone used the name you no longer would like, they have called it deadnaming, trying to give an air of actual death or finality over the ‘previous identity’ so it can be quashed and killed off. A sort of internal mental suicide where you can’t face living as you, so transform into something else to escape the reality – and as we know, you can only go so far with convincing yourself mentally, so I see why the physical then follows. We also reduce people to numbers in society though, in an attempt to separate them from their name and individuality, to help to break down what was, and replace with a desired result. Prisoners being given a number as well as other establishments areas, military and law enforcement cutting half your name away, taking away the personal touch but leaving the formal half. You might think it is just an action of efficiency, but the mental effect that has is important. To separate the mindset from the average folk. So, what is in a name? Why is it so important for people to have one, and how much of them and their true identity is linked to it? I have wondered previously about all these online personas people create of themselves, picking names and a face they ‘feel’ represents them, and playing that part in the metaverse we all mostly willingly take part in within social media. But if you subscribe to the belief in being able to manifest a separate entity through thought projection, as in Tupla Mysticism, then it becomes a different kettle of fish entirely. And a strange world emerges. So, at what point does the old identity disappear and the alter ego, or newly created persona take over, is there always a fight between the original self and the new self that needs to constantly reinforce its presence? With an almost complete breakdown of self once that encounters a disagreeable view or differing opinion. Only satisfied and ‘calm’ when being affirmed, validated and congratulated on said ‘new self’, but is ultimately unstable and becomes dependent on that continued attention to maintain their ‘new self’. Or at least that is how I see it and it comes across in the public forum it is presented within. There are plenty of people though who only need their own approval, and those people go about their business and just get on as best they can trying to navigate society, as we all have to…

(c) K Wicks